​Death is not new. And the way we celebrate the life just passed has its roots in ancient times. But the tools now available allow us to make our last goodbye memorable and meaningful in whole new dimensions with video memorials and modern funeral slideshows.
Rage, death and a woman's grief
It's true. We probably can thank the ancient Greeks for our modern approach to funerals. It was the Greeks after all who honed the funeral oration to a thing of beauty and high art; who made words uttered at the graveside a staple of every passing.

Some of the earliest instances of "eulogy" (a Greek word right there) appear in Homer's Iliad where the death of Patroclus all but drives Achilles, his friend, mad. His rage results in the death of Trojan hero Hector, whom Homer has lamented, fittingly, by his wife:
Husband, you were too young to die and leave me widowed in my home... You, Troy's guardian, have perished, you that watched over her and kept her loyal wives and babies safe.

Andromache's thoughts turn from Troy to her own special grief: Mine is the bitterest regret of all because you did not die in bed and stretching out your arms to me give me some tender word that I might have treasured in my tears by night and day.


Perhaps the most famous funeral oration in the ancient literature is Thucydides' report of Pericles' speech for the first dead in the Peloponnesian War. Pericles pauses at the inadequacy of words: These men have showed themselves valiant in action and it would be enough I think for their glories to be proclaimed in action... Our belief in the courage and manliness of so many should not be hazarded on the goodness or badness of one man's speech.

What is good and worthy
Words composed for and spoken at a funeral do have a special resonance. In them, we try to sum up the life and show its meaning for us. We attempt, through the service, to show that the deceased mattered.

We also try to use the opportunity of the funeral to teach our children about the life, and what was good and worthy about it. We try to honor family, society and religious traditions. It's a lot to ask - especially at a time when we are often weakened by grief. But the occasion demands it.

So we recognize the importance of the funeral ceremony, which has changed from ancient times and which for many folks has incorporated many of the wonderful opportunities now available for celebrating a life. Such as video technology.

Nothing else comes as close to bottling reality as the moving image. Maybe that's because a film unspools in a continuous progression - just as life does. And video has sound as well as images - putting it ahead of photographs, bare sound recordings and even biographical writing in terms of capturing personality. So when it comes to keeping our loved ones alive - even cheating death in a way - the best option is often a memorial video: Memorial Video Contact Form

Youth, splendor, age and wisdom
A memorial video can present a life with an accuracy, an immediacy and an emotional impact never dreamed of by the Greeks. It gives us an opportunity to reflect on the life and recall the days of youth and splendor and as well as the years of age and wisdom. If we are lucky, there will be words of the deceased left behind on old tapes or letters that can be incorporated, along with images and music.

The challenge is to rise to this important occasion - to use the energy and impetus unleashed by the death to create a fitting tribute. The work can be done by the family - and there are resources available to help with that task: DIY Funeral Slideshows

Things to include in memorial video and funeral slideshows
Funeral slideshows are now well accepted. But they can be so much more than a hum-drum cycle through the old family album. The freedom and options we now have can give the deceased a kind of immortality that was undreamed of even 10 years ago. You may even have the skill and patience to create a truly epic tribute to the life now passed. If you don't, there are professionals to help who have made funeral slideshows a specialty.

For example, why not consider adding voice over to the slideshow? Lots of video editing programs will allow you to narrate some brief comments - or perhaps narrate the entire arc of the life - with a simple tech store mic. Family members may prefer to record their thoughts and memories and have them played - rather than have to confront an audience for their eulogy at the funeral.

Maybe there is old home movie footage. My experience is that where there is film of the deceased, there is never enough. It is usually fleeting, or the bit in focus is oh so brief. So you may want to slow it down.

Don't forget to find out about poems and sayings for the memorial video or funeral slideshow. Consider letters and handwriting. Consider a web posting. Consider all the artifacts of the life now passed.

Death is not new, but the pain it causes to those remaining is evergreen. We should take our lead from the ancients and properly honor those who have passed on. And we should take full advantage of our creative potential to make the celebration of the life worthy of our loved one and those of us they have left behind.

No matter when a loved one passes away, it is always too soon. Creating an uplifting video like we do here at Your Story Here Video Memorials is essential to celebrate a life well lived. 

The center piece of most video is going to be photos.  But there is so much more that can be included!  That is the importance of professional video editing like we do here, as opposed to using forms or templates. Because here at Your Story Here, we aim to tell the story of the life as best we can in time we have and given the resources available. 
When selecting photos for the memorial video, prioritize images that showcase the deceased's hobbies, passions, and zest for life. Include smiling portraits that capture their vibrant personality and love for adventure. Highlight moments of joy and laughter, celebrating the cherished memories they created with family and friends. And don't just include people! Four legged and other pets often become part of our family and if they are then they should also be included.

We also encourage folks to incorporate quotations that resonate with the theme of celebrating life. A poignant reminder from Dr. Seuss encapsulates this sentiment: "Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened." Encourage loved ones to reflect on the happiness and love shared with the departed, finding solace in cherished memories. Sometimes we include words or wishes that have been shared with the family on the loved one's passing - they may have been shared in cards or email or even on social media.
Also we sometimes include cards, letters, birth certificates or other personal documents, baby books and any other artifact that helps tell the person's story. 
We also like to include video - either old family movies or more recent cell phone videos. The video memorial should be a heartfelt tribute, with family and friends sharing favorite memories about the deceased. Include footage of the departed engaging in activities they loved, whether it's dancing, gardening, or spending time with loved ones. These moments of genuine connection and joy serve as a beautiful tribute to their life and legacy.
Death is a natural part of life, but celebrating a life well-lived is a powerful way to honor the memory of a loved one. By choosing uplifting music, happy photos, meaningful quotations, and heartfelt anecdotes, we can create a video memorial that captures the essence of their spirit and the love they shared with those around them. Through celebration, we find healing and solace, keeping their memory alive in our hearts forever.
To get started on a video memorial or tribute video, such as a birthday celebration, contact us here. You may also view some samples here.

Why do we grieve for people we've never met? A recent article in The Economist explains the strong emotional reaction many of us have when actors and musicians pass away is less logical than we may think. The passion us humans feel has been well documented over the years. 

After Alexander Pushkin was shot in a duel in 1837, crowds of mourners formed in St Petersburg, requiring 60,000 troops to supervise the gathered mass of people. 

Fervid lamentation in the death of Rudolph Valentino in 1926 saw many people enter into a frenzy . Fans who mobbed the funeral parlor in New York where he lay on view were restrained by mounted police, with several fans reportedly killing themselves.

Today’s celebrity obsequies tend to be less fanatical, and more digital - but passionate all the same.

Recent outpouring of grief for Cormac McCarthy, Tina Turner, and Jimmy Buffet are odd and almost irrational, the Economist says. Why?

Because unlike other kinds of personal grief, this outpouring for celebrities does not come from intimacy. Unless you were one of the few to have a genuine interaction with the person, it is a misappropriation to connect the artist’s work - which may not align with their own beliefs - with the tide of your own life.

Additionally, while the individual may no longer be with us, the element that originally drew people to that person - their art - is still there. In fact, death has the opposite effect to a person’s art once they are laid down to rest. Curiosity and intrigue often drive up sales.

It is true, however, that no more writing or music is released after a person dies. And that knowledge settling down in someone’s psyche can be a genuine emotion. It depends on the individual, but often times their best work was accomplished before their demise. 

A few exceptions to an artist certainly having released their most beloved projects are Jimi Hendrix, Janis Joplin, and Amy Winehouse. Such early and untimely exits are tragic, and are surely worthy of genuine reactions and massive processions. Christopher Wallace, known by his stage moniker Notorious B.I.G., and the large-scale parade that followed his death at age 24, is perhaps the best example of this. 

"She had a great life and wants people to not grieve. (In case anyone would.) Grieving won't bring her back so what is the point... just makes you feel bad. And, she had a T-shirt that said, "I know what is right for everyone." She was right."

Making arrangements for your own, or someone else's passing, can feel like a transgression - an admission that the end is indeed nigh. Culturally, we are conditioned to deny the inevitable - or at least not speak its name.  And this is so even more for cancer sufferers who must "battle" to the very end and never give up hope. But planning and doing is therapeutic.  And when little more can be done to forestall the inevitable it can be good tonic - and sometimes even good fun - to take things into your own hands.

Kay's family celebrated two "celebration of life" parties while she was still alive.  She thought she would miss the third, when she was gone. But she was wrong.  She was there in wit and wisdom through all the fond memories and through her own hilarious obituary.

What was the person trying to do? Why? And how did it work out?

Mr. Hagerty thinks the safest course is to write your own story while you can - setting us aside just 15 or 20 minutes a week until the job is done.  He thinks that it is perilous to leave it to family - who may make a hash of the job. And certainly, family don't know the terrain as well as the subject themselves.

But if withering honesty about the mission and struggle (with only intermittent successes) that life is to many of us, it is hard to know how many (if any) mistakes to own up to.  He says he always includes in his newspaper obituaries the ups and downs, the triumphs and errors, even the humiliations. And he believes that he must do the same for his own story.

But how many of my embarrassing mistakes, lapses and weaknesses should I record? And which ones? I’m still struggling with that part.

Perhaps we can agree that the savor of life is indeed partly the struggle. And even where a life ends in some comfort it is not remiss to mention goals attempted and even goals not reached.  It is important for younger folks to know that in many cases even a successful life was accompanied by setbacks.

We have assisted many individuals assemble their own video memorials, often assisted by a family member.  Sometimes the project is used to help celebrate a birthday then it lies ready to put into service when different circumstances demand!

There is a gulf which separates the “get over it” camp from the “it's OK to stay connected” folks. The gulf tends to be generational – old school versus new learning. It is also cultural – different societies have different ways of dealing with those who have passed on – some try to maintain a stiff upper lip and others have sought to maintain some connection and dialogue with the “spirits” of their dead. Psychologist Louise Kaplan is definitely new school:

“We are the only animal species that possesses – and is possessed by – history, personal and cultural. We are never entirely free of the past. The physical death of the beloved is not the end of our attachment to him or her. Their presence is always with us.” (“No Voice Is Ever Wholly Lost” 1996)

In her book "Passed and Present", Allison Gilbert makes 85 individual suggestions (“Forget Me Nots”) for keeping memories of loved ones alive. (But don't be alarmed or put off – the book is a nifty 200 pages, modestly priced, and an easy read.) For the purposes of this blog I will pass along seven (pretty much chosen at random).

1. Cook: Preparing a dish associated with your loved one can help make you feel closer to them. And it can create an occasion to talk about them. A related “Forget Me Not” is to assemble and digitize recipes associated with your love one.

2. Write it Down: Gilbert suggests recalling and writing down words and phrases used by your loved one. She suggests finding a small note book that can go wherever you go. (Or, if you have a smart phone you could use its “voice memo” app to orally record you recollection.)

3. Build or Designate a Refuge: Sometimes is helps to find or even create a special place to remember a loved one. You can choose to place items there or just know that that is your spot for quiet meditation.

4. Craft their image into art: Using an image of your loved one you can (now) have it printed onto any manner of permanent keepsake. (There are dozens of online photo printers who offer an enormous range of printable products.)

5. Invite Stories: using Facebook or a website (or just plain email or texting) ask people close to you or your loved one to share their memories. (You can do this with video or audio, encouraging people to use their smart phones and emailing, texting or posting the results.)

6. Hire a Personal Historian: Personal historians (Gilbert says) can help craft your family's story so that it's intelligible and captivating with a book, a video or a family website from the material they've collected or helped to catalogue (her words not ours we promise!).

7. Share Their Objects: Maybe the person was a collector or an artist or maybe you just have lots of their letters. Gilbert suggests that you can share those items broadly with family and friends. It may be the object itself or it maybe a printed or digital facsimile.

Gilbert has, of course, many other ideas associated with using photos, slides, audio and home movies – you have found this site after all so I am guessing you are already way ahead on those ideas! But however you choose to preserve or commemorate your loved one, remember that one of the keys is – as Cheryl Sandberg found – is to respect your feelings.